


The Ugly Truth

by MansiJain



Category: Cruel Intentions (1999)
Genre: Depression, F/M, Multiple Suicide Attempts, Sebastian and Kathryn POV, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-14
Packaged: 2018-12-23 21:36:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11998425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MansiJain/pseuds/MansiJain
Summary: Annette prevents Kathryn's downfall. A wrong decision costs her Sebastian. When she realizes it, he is already dead. Others view her as a rich over pampered girl but she alone knows the ugly truth and perhaps Annette. Then fate decides to give her another chance by sending Sebastian back from the brink of death. Still furious at her he doesn't want her to know about his survival





	1. Chapter 1

Title : The Ugly Truth

Summary: Kathryn's ruin is prevented by Annette. A wrong decision costs her Sebastian. When she realizes it, he is already dead. Others view her as a rich over pampered girl but she alone knows the ugly truth and perhaps Annette. Then fate decides to give her another chance by sending Sebastian back from the brink of death. Still furious at her he doesn't want her to know about his survival.

A/N: This story will start on a very sad note.

**_ Chapter-1 _ **

**_ The Ugly Truth _ **

Kathryn is sitting on his bed right now. She does this a lot these days. The past month has been an absolute nightmare. A month has passed since his demise, his murder actually. She killed him. She killed Sebastian. This is what Ronald screamed at her after his funeral, that no matter what Annette claims, he knows her reality. Kathryn had denied it initially, claiming that it was just a prank, that she didn't want him to die.

The truth is that she provoked Ronald to go after him and Sebastian died because of it.

She is a murderer.

She deserves to be hanged till death. Instead, Annette Hargrove prevents her impending downfall by lying that the journal was fake and that someone had filled her rosary with Coke and suddenly everyone loves Kathryn more than ever. They think that she is some innocent little girl who is the true victim in all of this. They think that she is a happy, rich and an over pampered girl and everybody wants a piece of her. She has finally dropped the act of an innocent virgin now, ignoring most of the people who try to meet her or sweet talk her.

They don't care. They have never cared so that is not a surprise.

Nothing else has really changed. Nothing except the fact that she has murdered the only person who saw through her, who was a real constant in her life. Most of the days, she can't look at her own reflection. It seems that her own face is laughing at her.

She had thought that destroying Sebastian had been a triumph over him. The joke is on her though. It always has been. She had mocked him for abandoning the only girl who had ever loved him when she killed the only man she could ever probably love or one who could really love her.

Most of the days, she finds it difficult to get out of the bed. She wonders what would have become of her if Annette had not been with her. Then, there are some days when she misses him desperately. She wants to feel his familiar warmth and scent. She wants him to smile at her like he always did.

But he would never be back. This reality hits her almost everyday now. Not a day has gone by when she has not wandered the hallways of her house in search of something that belongs to him, something that she can use to feel him again, feel his presence again.

She is sitting on the edge of his bed right now, trying to remember him laid down on his bed in his boxers. She tries to remember herself sitting on his hips, her arse pressing against his hardness but it's getting unbearable as the days pass.

She gets up and wipes her eyes before locking his room and walking out of her empty house. It's so big, empty and useless without him that it has started creeping her out. She sits on a bench in the garden. a stole around her body and stares at the children playing. Days pass and everyone moves on. He is gradually becoming a memory in everyone's mind except her. Each and every memory is fresh in her mind.

She yearns to move on too. She sniffs and sighs hard. The tears don't stop and the memories keep on haunting her. No one except Annette, Ronald and Kathryn knows that she was the one who had sent Ronald after him.

Annette pleaded Ronald on her behalf. Kathryn almost wishes that she hadn't. That way she could perhaps forgive herself eventually. This is completely unbearable though. She can't breathe, she can't smile, she can't eat. She can't do anything accept existing and her existence has become meaningless. No one except Annette cares that she is alive or dead.

Someone settles down beside her and she doesn't bother looking at her companion, knowing that it is Annette. She takes meals with Kathryn. Actually, Kathryn removed the domestic help she had and stopped eating at all, not because she can't cook, but because she didn't feel hungry at all.

Moreover, the dining table brought her old memories back when she would deliberately lick her lips to tease him and he would tease her back.

What a terrible existence. She has killed the only one who was a match for her.

Her fingers are squeezed together and she blinks rapidly to concentrate on Annette. No use losing the only person who can tolerate her now. Kathryn blinks rapidly to remove the traces of her tears and smiles before turning towards Annette.

Her eyes are so understanding that Kathryn's false smile disappears and tears start slipping without her consent, trickling down her cheeks. She looks helplessly at the girl. Warm arms wrap around her waist and Annette pulls Kathryn close to her. It's comforting to feel someone so close to her. She doesn't remember when she had felt this last. No one except Sebastian has ever embraced her as if they mean it and she misses him so bloody much.

A sob wracks her frame and she tries to stop herself from crying but can't. Annette rubs her back and Kathryn sobs harder, murmuring, "I didn't want him to die. I didn't. I want him back."

She has not visited his grave even once since the funeral. She can't face it yet.

"I know that you didn't. Please calm down Kathryn." She whispers and Kathryn breathes hard, trying to calm down. Finally she pulls back and looks at Annette.

She wipes Kathryn's tears, her eyes warm and kind. Kathryn had always wondered what he saw in her. She knows now. Kathryn doesn't understand Annette. She is an enigma for her. Kathryn doesn't know how she can forgive her in the blink of an eye.

"Did you eat today?" Annette asks and Kathryn shakes her head, murmuring, "I wasn't hungry."

"You spent your day thinking about him again, didn't you?" She asks Kathryn and Kathryn looks at her. These little things have stopped surprising her now. Somehow Annette always knows.

She simply shrugs and turns her eyes back on the children.

Kathryn loved playing badminton and Sebastian shared her love for the sport. They often played together. She still remembers their games vividly. She simply loved playing with him.

She can imagine the two of them playing together, sweaty and smiling widely, challenging each other, teasing each other. Why did she ruin everything? Why does she always ruin everything?

"Kathryn." Annette's sharp voice reaches her ears and Kathryn realizes that she is on her feet now and Annette's hand on her forearm is stopping her from moving ahead.

She turns her eyes towards Annette's alarmed ones and sits back on the bench after shrugging carelessly.

"You are going to get yourself killed some day." Annette murmurs and Kathryn stares at her palms. She clenches and un-clenches her cold palms and murmurs, "That's what I deserve, don't I? I killed him."

"For heavens sake, you played a prank and it was an accident. You didn't kill him. Why don't you listen to me?" Annette mutters before kneeling in front of her knees, looking into her eyes.

"If I hadn't sent Ronald after him that day-" Kathryn starts and Annette cuts her off, "Will you stop thinking about that day again and again. It is past and he is de- gone. Get over him. Live in present."

Kathryn can see a helplessness in Annette's eyes and before she can wonder about it, it vanishes.

"Come on. Let's eat at that new Italian restaurant today. come." Annette drags her up and Kathryn follows her, murmuring softly, "Let's just have something at home."

"No. I am bored and we are going." Annette replies firmly and pushes Kathryn inside her car. Kathryn places her head against the glass and stares at nothing, reminiscing the many car rides she had enjoyed with Sebastian.

She hears a helpless sigh beside her and a mumble, "Please move on." and just ignores it. There is no point. She can't simply move on.

Why did he have to die? How is she supposed to go on now?

This is the ugly truth of her meaningless life. This is her punishment... to live with what she has done.

XXXX

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	2. Hatred

**_Chapter-2_ **

**_Hatred_ **

Kathryn looks at her reflection in the mirror. She skipped school today, not that school does her any good these days. She doesn't pay any attention at all.

Her eyes are swollen and red rimmed. She is a shadow of her past self. Her once curvy body is shapeless now. It is probably the result of her erratic eating habits. Sometimes she goes for days without eating. Everything seems a chore now. What's the point of going on like this?

_"My triumph is not over her. It's over you."_

She tries to ignore the words. He is mocking her or perhaps this is the way of portraying his fury. She wants to ask for his apology and talking to his photograph portrait doesn't help.

 _"You were very much in love with her and you are still in love with her."_  She covers her ears with her hands and closes her eyes to escape his voice.

 _"It amused me to make you ashamed of it."_  She shakes her head to escape it. But he doesn't stop here. He continues repeating her words.

_"You gave up on the first person you ever loved because I threatened your reputation."_

"Sorry. I am sorry. Please stop." She pleads and pulls her hair in frustration. He continues, murmuring cruelly,  _"Don't you get it... you are just a toy Sebastian."_

She screams, tears trickling down her eyes, "No. no no no. Not a toy. No."

 _"A little toy I like to play with."_  He whispers and she falls on her knees, unable to bear the weight of her own words anymore. They were the last words she had ever spoken to him.

"NO." She screams and he ignores her, continuing,  _"I assume... you have come here to make some arrangements but..."_

"No. Please Sebastian.I am so sorry."

 _"Unfortunately, I don't fuck losers."_ His voice is as mocking as hers was and she is unable to understand her own reasons for doing what she did. It's not like she was desperate to insult him and she didn't want him to die.

"Please. Please. Forgive me. Come back please." She sobs and pleads but he continues whispering softly.

_"Losers."_

_"Losers."_

_"Come here Kathryn. I am waiting for you. Come to me. I am waiting for you. Come."_ He whispers and her heart beats loudly.

"You will forgive me." She murmurs, her eyes clenched shut because she knows that he will disappear if she opens them.

_"yes. Kathryn. I will. Come. I am waiting."_

Nodding, she walks towards her bathtub in only her panties and bra and fills it with cold water.

_"Kathryn."_

"Yes." She murmurs, as she gets into the tub and sits, her back against the cool surface of the tub and her eyes closed and he replies, " _I miss you so much._ "

"I am coming." She mumbles desperately, "Just a few minutes more."

 _"I am waiting."_  He mumbles in a soft voice and she opens her eyes.

"Sebastian." She calls desperately, but receives no answer.

" I am sorry. Do you- Sebastian- I - I am coming." She pleads and lays down in the tub, pulling her face below the water and closes her eyes. She wants to hear his voice so very desperately.

"Kathryn. KATHRYN. GET OUT OF THE TUB." She hears a frantic scream and pulls her face out of the water, startled. A few seconds later, she realizes that the voice belongs to Annette.

"Annette." She mutters after spitting water out of her mouth and starts coughing.

"Christ, woman. What the hell were you doing?" Her eyes are as wide as saucers and terrified as she continues, "You were trying to drown yourself, weren't you?"

"No. No, of course not." Kathryn murmurs, her hands around her wet bathrobe, "I was just taking bath."

"In your panties and bra." She mutters furiously and Kathryn shrugs.

Annette opens her mouth and then closes it, eyes wide in shock now and simply grabs Kathryn's towel.

She takes Kathryn towards her room by her hand and then dries her off.

"Why did you do it?" Annette asks her and she knows that there is no point in lying. Annette knows what Kathryn was trying to do.

"He told me that he is waiting for me. I just wanted to apologize to him in person." Kathryn mutters when Annette forces her on the bed and settles in front of her on her knees.

As soon as the words slip Kathryn's mouth, Annette is on her feet, staring at her with horrified eyes.

"What did you say? He asked you to-"

"He told me that he is waiting, that he misses me." Kathryn murmurs, her eyes on her hands. She hears a thud and looks up to find that Annette has slumped on a chair.

"You are hallucinating Kathryn. He can't be here. You know that." Annette murmurs and Kathryn shrugs, "I know what I heard. He told me-"

"Heard... you didn't see him?" Annette asks her carefully and Kathryn looks at her before replying, "He sort of dispapears completely when I open my eyes,"

Annette looks pained for a few moments before she finally composes herself and replies, "Okay. Okay. I believe you. Just take rest for now. All right. Please don't do anything like this again. I am just going to bring my things. I am going to stay with you for a few days."

Kathryn stares at Annette for a few moments, "I don't need a baby sitter."

"Duh, I am a friend, not your keeper, Kathryn. Honestly, sometimes, you seem so thick." Annette mutters but Kathryn knows that she is lying. In a way she is pleased that someone cares for her so much but she doesn't want a keeper. She stays quiet though. She is grateful for the company. These days, this house seems haunted and she doesn't think that she can tolerate it anymore.

"Now. Have some sleep and ignore his voice if you hear it again." Annette mutters and helps her inside the blanket. Kathryn murmurs softly, "Thank you." and Annette smiles, her eyes sad and murmurs, "It's the least I can do for you."

Kathryn smiles and burrows inside the blanket, wondering about her last words. But then tiredness wins and she succumbs to slumber.

XXXX

"How can you be so heartless?" Annette screams at him and he rolls his eyes before muttering, "I know her better then you. She has always just wanted my attention. She is heartless, no matter what she makes you believe."

"She could have died today. You- how dare you do it? She was trying to drown herself, thinking that you would forgive her." Annette whispers and Sebastian rolls his eyes, "Why should I care? She didn't, did she? I won't have let her die, all right. I would have pulled her out before she did."

"Oh! And then what? Just continued torturing her into madness? Look. She just wants to apologize. You can go your merry way after she does." Annette murmurs and he smiles pleasantly at her, "That would no fun. I want to pay her back. I don't care for her. As far as I am concerned, she can go to hell."

Annette's sad eyes gaze at him before she murmurs, "That's where you are wrong Sebastian. You do care about her and I don't think that she can take this for too long. If this continues, it won't be long before I will have to send her to a mental hospital. She is deteriorating. She doesn't eat, doesn't sleep, doesn't think about anything except you and now that I think of it, you are just pushing her towards insanity."

Sebastian rolls his eyes at her and turns away, staring outside the window, at the clear sky.

"I am leaving. As far as I am concerned, you are dead."

"Don't tell her about me. I will ruin her. She is better off not knowing about me at all." Sebastian murmurs dangerously. He wants to punish her for her betrayal. The fact that she is regretting is irrelevant.

"I know that." She replies and walks away, her face wet with tears. He doesn't understand how she can forgive her. He can't. He simply can't.

XXXX

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